Here are some poems (mostly Limericks) from previous years that I had kept and found on my laptop.
Man In The Lake
There once was a man who lived in a lake,
Whose flatulence made the earth quake.
As he let one rip
The wave toppled a ship
And it flattened everything else in its wake.
(Ashley D, Year 9, 2007)
Cook from Wooranook
There once was a chef from Wooranook,
Who left surprises in whatever he cooked.
He kept losing his hair
It could be found everywhere,
So if you eat at his restaurant I suggest you look.
(Blake D, Year 9, 2007)
Footballer from Nyah West
There once a man from Nyah West.
He played football and was considered the best.
He always had a crack,
Even when he played fullback,
If you saw him, you’d think he was blessed.
(Joseph P, Year 9, 2007)
The Dog that Could Fly
There once was a dog that could fly,
The people waved as he went on by.
Then one day he fell,
And didn’t land so well,
So now he doesn’t soar so high.
(Brody M, Year 9, 2015)
The Man from Qatar
There once was a man from Qatar,
Who loved to strum on his guitar.
He snapped off a string,
Off it did fling,
From then on his songs sounded bizarre.
(Hannah G, Year 9, 2015)
Little Miss Muffet
There was a girl who sat under a tree,
Who tried to drink her cup of tea.
Then a spider came down,
And landed on her gown,
So she squealed “Get away from me!”
(Harley D, Year 8, 2007)
Teen With Low-Slung Pants
Yes, this was inspired by a student in the class at the time. He liked it. ;)
A young hood roamed the streets of Walpeup,
Whose only words spoken were “Was’up?”
The farmers all laughed
As he shuffled on past,
To the ladies cry of “Pull those pants up!”.
(Mr C)
The Dwarf
Inspired by our reading of "The Hobbit" at the time.
A dwarf once abandoned the mines,
For he disliked the dark, dusty confines.
He strode into the open air,
His eyes hurt from the glare,
So he returned to where the sun never shines.
(Mr C)
Punctuation Woes
Another inspired by the class.
Some students were troubled by punctuation.
Their teacher couldn’t remedy the situation.
He wondered, “If the students don’t try,
What future have I,
And what will be the state of our nation?”
(MrC)
Year Eight
Another inspired by a student, and maybe a touch of my own memories ;).
A student once said in Year Eight
“Nothing more than school I do hate”
But as he got on,
His memories grew fond,
Of those times he shared with his mates.
(Mr C)
Drunk Lion
From when we did some silly, animal Limericks.
A lion once went on a bender
Mixing beer and blood in a blender.
The lion gave up the fight,
To the antelope’s delight,
Whose hides no longer seemed quite so tender.
(Mr C)
Footballing Lamb
Another silly animal one.
A lamb once played footy for Narraport,
For at selection the team was too short.
They sent him a pass,
But he just ate the grass,
I guess sheep aren’t meant to play sport.
(Mr C)
The Three-Legged Dog
And another.
There was a three-legged dog from Cockatoo
Who loved to ride in the back of the ute.
Over a bump, out he went
His front leg was all bent,
And now the poor sod only has two.
(Mr C)
The Boy with the Large Eye
And just another silly one.
There was a boy with one large eye,
Understandably he became quite shy.
There was a lot he couldn’t do,
But I can tell you,
He was certainly good at ‘Eye Spy’.
(Mr C)